Monday, September 21, 2015

My Achilles Heel...

Kämpfender Achilles by Teicher.jpg
(Wikimedia Commons)

I woke up this morning realizing I did something this past weekend I've done for years without really stopping to think about what I was doing. I'm sure I'm not alone when I say I spent some time over the weekend unconsciously munching on food without even realizing what I putting into my mouth. Now with my heightened awareness of trying to get healthier, I woke up this morning, stepped on the scales and was somewhat surprised to see that the numbers have gone up a little.

I guess I REALLY shouldn't have been surprised when I think back to the higher carb choices I made over the past two days but I WAS a bit surprised at how angry I was at myself. You would have thought a stranger had stepped into the room by the way I was arguing with myself...dredging up some old taunts as I berated myself for giving in to my Achilles heel...weekend eating splurges...but then I suddenly stopped in mid sentence. In the sudden silence it dawned on me that I had reached my first roadblock on my way to a leaner, healthier me.

If every other time when the numbers on the scales go up ends in my tearing my sprit down & never changing my attitude to get healthier, then how would THIS time be any different?


It's ME who has to do the changing. Change the way I think...the way I approach my weekends, the way I see food...if I'm ever going to get the tempting, taunting FOOD MONKEY off my back! So I took a few deep breaths, counted to ten, and headed out the door to my daily gym workout. I almost gave in to the feeling "what's the use" like I had in the past but determinedly headed toward the gym instead of going in the other direction because I KNOW that is where the changes in my lifestyle will come from.

I'm not saying it wasn't hard to shut the negative thoughts running through my head off, but it definitely was worth it. I'm sure there will be many, many more times during this journey of mine where I will be faced with the negative voices in my head, but for today, I've made one small step for me, one large step for healthier living!

Okay, so tell me what do YOU do to make it through the weekends? Plan your meals? Throw in an extra workout? Help me out with your words of wisdom in the comments below so I can prepare for next weekend...;~)


Low Carb Monkey Bread

    For the Dough:
  1. In a small bowl, whisk together the psyllium and yeast.
  2. In a large bowl, whisk together the almond milk, applesauce, egg whites and extracts. Dump the psyllium/yeast mix on top and quickly whisk together.
  3. In a medium-sized bowl, whisk together the soy flour, baking powder and salt. Dump the dry over the wet and fold together with a rubber spatula.
  4. Shape the sticky dough into a ball and cover with plastic wrap. Place the bowl in a warm area for 1 hour (I used a warming drawer set to 90 degrees Fahrenheit).
  5. In a small bowl, add the coconut flour. Take about 2 tbs and dust it over the sticky, slightly risen dough. Gently fold the mixture until it absorbs the coconut flour, then dust another 2 tbs over the dough and fold again. Do this with the rest of the coconut flour.
  6. Shape the dough into a ball and rip off evenly-sized chunks, then roll into balls about 1.5" in size.
  7. For the Base Coating and Cinnamon Sugar Coating:
  8. In a small microwave-safe bowl, add the coconut oil and microwave until completely melted. Stir in the butter extract.
  9. In a medium-sized bowl, whisk together the stevia mix and cinnamon.
  10. For the Assembly:
  11. Line one 9” cake pan with a parchment paper circle and set aside.
  12. Dunk the dough balls into the coconut oil mixture, roll around in the cinnamon sugar mixture, then place into the prepared pan. Do this with all of the balls and sprinkle the leftover cinnamon-sugar mix throughout the pan.
  13. Cover the pan with plastic wrap and place in a warm area for 1 hour (I used the warming drawer again)

  14. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit and bake for ~32 minutes, or until the sugar melts into caramel-like goodness and the center of the bread is spongy yet firm when tapped.

  15. Flip the pan over onto a platter and let cool upside-down for ~20 minutes, then carefully lift the pan off. Serve warm!

To store, keep tightly covered at room temperature for MAX one day, after that, this requires refrigeration (tightly wrapped). This recipe is: gluten free, sugar free, low carb, high fiber, high protein!

One two-piece serving yields 180 cal, 8 g fat, 160 mg sodium, 15 g carb, 8 g fiber, 11 g protein.

***I have more low carb recipes listed on my Pinterest boarrd at or check out my Clawing My Way Back To A Healthier Me board on Pinterest at***

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Falling In "Like" Again...

Folded Shure SRH840.jpg
"Folded Shure SRH840" by Minseong Kim - Own work.

It's been a week and a half since I joined the gym. I joined TWO gyms in fact and have determined I like one much more than the other one so instead of rotating between the two, I'm probably going to allow the special I signed up on at the other gym run out without the benefit of the personnel seeing my smiling face. The gym I'm staying with is really more my style.

They greet me when I come in but don't get all up into my personal space. There are enough equipment all around that I'm not fighting for the treadmill I choose to do my cardio on. There is a "stretching" area I use after my cardio workout and it's tucked off to one corner of the room so I don't look like a contortionist on display as I try to stretch these older muscles into some resemblance of a lean, mean butt-kicking machine.

I had my doubts I would like going to the gym. I would have argued with you a mere week ago that it was going to be a real challenge to go and I would have to force myself to get up an hour earlier every day to put myself through torture for the sake of a healthier body. But that wasn't the case.

Discovery about oneself is an exciting thing and I've discovered one really cool thing about myself over these past two weeks. I have fallen in "like" with going to the gym. I have a playlist of songs I really enjoy listening to and I will ramp up the treadmill to 3 miles an hour (maybe not a lot for others but definitely a challenge for a chubby momma like myself) and will do pushups against the handlebars while I rock out to the music. And oh yeah, I do this all while I keep my eyes closed and sing silently to the music.

I'm sure I probably look silly, but I have come to the conclusion that I really don't care. This journey is about me and if I'm going to look like a sweaty beached whale for a little while at the gym I might as well have fun while I'm doing it!

What do YOU do to make going to the gym more fun? Share with me in the comments below...


Cloud Buns
(    )
10 halves or 5 servings                                         

  1. Preheat oven to 300 degrees.
  2. Separate the eggs very carefully, there must be no yolk in the white.
  3. In one bowl, mix together the egg yolks, the 3 T. of Cottage Cheese OR Cream Cheese and the one packet of Sweetener until smooth.
  4. In the other bowl add 1/4 teaspoon of Cream of Tartar to the whites and beat the whites on high speed until they are fluffy and form nice peaks.
  5. Very carefully fold the egg yolk mixture into the egg whites until mixed, but try and not break down the fluffiness of the egg whites too much.
  6. Spray two cookie sheets with Pam or other fat-free cooking spray.
  7. With a large spoon, "scoop" the mixture into 10 even rounds on the sheets (about the size of the top-half of the McDonalds hamburger bun; roughly 3/4 inch thick and 4 to 5 inches across).
  8. Bake on the middle rack. Here is when you have to watch them, because the cooking time the same on any two batches. It is somewhere around 1/2 hour, but it could be less or more. You just need to watch them until them become nice and golden brown (again, the color of a McDonalds bun).
  9. Remove from the pans and cool on a rack or cutting board.
  10. While warm they are crumbly and similar to cooked meringue - but don't let this fool you! Once completely cool, seal them in a ziplock storage baggie or a tupperware over night. They will totally change their consistency, to something much more like bread - a softer texture that is nice and chewy. If you do not like softer chewy bread, then eat them as they are, nice and crisp.
  11. Since the sides that were facing the pan are perfectly flat, you use these to spread things on, or make sandwiches, or even as a burger bun! The choice is up to you, and you will be quite amazed at how much like a bun these really are!

***1 serving (1 halves) has 75 caloires, 6 g fat, 136.5 mg cholesterol, 67.8 g sodium, 75.3 mg potassium, .7 g carbs, 4.4 g protein***

***I have more low carb recipes listed on my Pinterest boarrd at or check out my Clawing My Way Back To A Healthier Me board on Pinterest at***

Monday, September 14, 2015

A Step In The Right Direction

File:Walking baby tux.gif 
I woke up this morning and realized I'm one week into my new life. The changes I've put into place will hopefully lead to a healthier me. Stepping on the scales I discovered I'm down a whopping FIVE POUNDS from this time last week!

Am I thrilled with those numbers? Of course I am. Realistically I know most of that is probably water loss and I can't expect those kind of results every week. But it's a step in the right direction.
To be perfectly honest, it's not the numbers on the scale I worry about. I've adjusted the food I eat and I've increased my physical activity level. Simple mathematics tells me the numbers will go down. What I worry more about is how to change my mindset which helped get me in this predicament in the first place.

I could be wrong, but I believe most people become overweight for three reasons:

1) Emotional eating...the main monkey on my back. I will have to retrain my brain to look at certain situations in a different manner so once I get the extra weight off, I won't end up allowing negative thoughts sending those numbers back up again

2) Medical conditions...unfortunately I have a couple of those as well. It's a struggle sometimes to select one healthy option that doesn't trigger an unwanted dietary reaction but I'm slowly figuring things out.

3) Pure laziness...sometimes I'm guilty of this. Rushing in the morning so I won't be late for work or at the end of the day being too tired to go home and cook supper, it's easier (and the lazy way out) to grab fast food. I've now stocked my pantry with easy to make meals and carry a piece of fruit to eat on my drive home.

Do you know of any other reason people gain weight? Do one or more of these reasons hold YOU back from creating a healthier version of yourself? WE all can do this! All it's going to take is to begin with one step in the right direction...


Veggie Cheese Bake (6 servings)

4 medium crookneck squash
4 medium zucchini
1 large orange bell pepper
2 cups low sodium chicken broth
4 oz Kraft fat free Mexican shredded cheese mix
10 slices fat free American cheese
Garlic powder, black pepper, and salt-free seasoning to taste

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.Spray rectangular baking pan with nonstick cooking spray. Layer slices of crookneck squash on the bottom of the pan. Layer slices of orange bell pepper on top of squash. Layer slices of zucchini on top of bell pepper. Add seasoning and chicken broth. Cover with aluminum foil and bake covered for 45 minutes or until vegetable are thoroughly cooked. Drain excess chicken broth to be used later for another recipe and sprinkle shredded cheese over top of vegetables. Layer slices of American cheese over shredded cheese and place uncovered pan back in the oven for another 10 minutes or until cheese is melted. Allow vegetable to sit for 5-10 minutes in order to create a cheese sauce. Yields: 6 servings.

Each serving has 179 calories, 4 g fat, 2.5 saturated fat, 853 mg sodium, 776 mg potassium, 19 g carbs, 4.5 g fiber, 11 g sugars, 17.5 g protein.

***I have more low carb recipes listed on my Pinterest boarrd at or check out my Clawing My Way Back To A Healthier Me board on Pinterest at***

Thursday, September 10, 2015

The Blister Zone

File:Nordic walking on treadmill.jpg

So I'm happy to report three days into my new, healthier lifestyle I have managed to get out of bed when my alarm goes off and make it to the gym on time to do my new workout routine.

Did I mention I was crazy enough to join TWO gyms? At the SAME TIME!!

But before you call the men in the white coats to come cart me away to the loony bin, I had a very good reason for doing so. I don't know if you have a thing like Groupon where you live but it is a company that basically offers cool things for little money in the hopes of getting new clientele in the door of their businesses. A month ago Groupon ran a special from the gym located right next door to where I work. It was a heck of a deal...three months unlimited training for $ I bought it. Then about three weeks ago, a different gym company close to my house offered a great deal as well...unlimited training for $10 per month with no I signed up for that one too.

I go to the gym by my house on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays for 30 minutes of cardio (treadmill or bike) and 30 minutes stretching (because I want to kick my Taekwondo instructor in the head one day!). Then on Tuesdays and Thursdays I go to the gym next to my place of work for 30 minutes of cardio (treadmill or bike) and 30 minutes on either abs work, back work, or legs work. If I have a meeting during the week like I sometimes do then I will pick up a Saturday or Sunday for the workout I missed.

The gym membership by my work runs out December 1st. I would have gone with them for an extended membership after my special but their prices were 4X what I am paying at the gym by my house and I like the overall atmosphere of the other gym better anyway. Come December I will just switch to going to the gym by my house five days a week.

Sounds like a good plan, right? There's only one thing I didn't anticipate that almost stopped me in my tracks the very first day.

The Blister Zone

You know what I mean...when you work out on a treadmill in those brand new shoes that haven't been broken in yet and about five minutes into your workout your little toe is on fire because you've rubbed the little sucker raw and a monstrous blister has formed to torture you! I didn't want to stop my workout so I finished the hour out before checking the damage. My goodness, the blister on my right toe looked like a alien thing had landed on the side of my foot! It was so huge that once I got my shoe off to bandage it up, I literally couldn't put my shoe back on and had to switch to sandals.

Did I let my first day injury stop me? HECK NO! I'm in this for the long haul so I worked out in sandals yesterday and today. The gym by my house has a poster advising they don't want to see people in sandals at their facility. While I respect their request, I can't get to the store to buy better shoes until the weekend so they will have to work with me and my poor damaged toe until then because this pudgy momma has a treadmill to conquer!!

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

It's A New Day...

It's been seven months since I've posted here. Seven months where LIFE beat down on me and kept me busy and gave me excuses to ignore the pink elephant trumpeting in the room. For fifteen years I have been passionately pursuing the chance to receive my Master Fifth Degree Black Belt rank in TaeKwonDo but for the past two years or so I have sorely neglected my training. This shows in the numbers on the scales and my inability to participate in testing for the ultimate rank at my school.

To be completely honest, I am ashamed of what I have become. Saddened I have allowed ANYTHING...EVERYTHING...get in the way of reaching my martial arts goals. So easy to blame the fourteen hour days of summer camp or commitments of my new writing career or even the requests of friends and family that can eat away at my free time. But I started this particular blog to try and keep it be completely honest with myself...and the ONLY REASON I am overweight is because I have allowed it to be so.

I'm returning to this blog after a soul-searching hiatus where I have worked hard to prepare myself for the long road ahead. There are unique as well as common medical issues I deal with but I refuse to allow them to get in the way. I have limited financial means to buy the healthiest of meal items but refuse to allow that to stop me from doing what I can. I even have a bum leg that is a constant reminder of the person I can no longer be but I REFUSE to allow it to be the reason I won't reach my goal of becoming the new and improved me!

To that end, and to keep myself accountable, I will randomly post updates to my journey as well as share various things I learn along the way which have been helpful to me. I know I'm not alone in my struggles with my weight. But it is my nature to if I am not worthy of a healthier lifestyle and THAT is the monkey on my back I will endeavor to shake off. 

Am I alone in feeling this way? I don't think so. I think there are many others like me in the world....wanting so badly to step out of the shadows and into the light of self-appreciation. Maybe some will follow my journey. Maybe some will join me in the battle. I hope so...then we can all be WARRIORS together and reach our individual goals together!

Here are four things I've put into place to help me move forward with my plan to claw my way back to a healthier me:

1. Joined a's only $10 a month and by cutting out junk food I will be able to afford to do this. I started today and will see how sore I am in the morning...;~)

2. Loaded the Hungry Girl Diet app on my iPhone...this free app gives me easy access to healthier meal choices and I can always go to their website at for even more cool recipes.

3. Loaded the My Fitness Pal app on my iPhone...this free app allows me to track things like what I eat, how much exercise I get, and the water I drink. It also gives me encouraging information like how much overall weight I will lose in a certain time frame if I stay on track.

4. Going back to training one on one with my martial arts instructor two times a week beginning next week. The combination of these changes will hopefully allow me to test for my Master rank by this time next year.

Have YOU  been wanting to make changes in YOUR life? Are YOU wanting to get back to a healthier weight? You don't have to struggle alone. Let's reach that goal together!! Let me know in the comments one change you can implement in your life right now to put you on that path to a better you...

Wednesday, February 11, 2015


When I say I'm rolling in dough, I don't necessarily mean I'm up to my eyeballs in pastries. I mean I have a little extra money coming my way and I'm trying to decide what to spend it on.

The gremlins living in my house don't like me trying to save up my money. It seems like every time I try to save a little back those gremlins go to work making as much trouble for me as possible.  The first time I tried stashing some extra cash away at my house, my water heater in my kitchen burst and flooded my kitchen. The next time I tried saving money, my toilet literally fell through the bathroom floor. The last time I tried to save up some coins, my car broke down. I began seeing a pattern where I believe God doesn't want me to depend on some secret stash I tuck away in some can somewhere. 

So what to do with this treasure trove of moolah I find coming my way? 

I've decided to invest it in ME! I'm going to buy some things to help me on my way to getting healthier. But what to choose? Should I buy a workout video to do at home? Maybe a book to help me make better food decisions? How about a fancy pedometer to count my steps while I walk? It's not a whole lot of money but enough to buy a couple of things to help me along the way as I slim down.

I need your help! If you had about $100 to spend what would YOU spend it on? Give me some suggestions and help me choose some cool things to keep me motivated...


Thursday, February 5, 2015



Now that my world seems to have settled into a cautious wait and see mode, I can get back to checking out what is available online to help me with my goal of becoming healthier in 2015. A few years ago I came across a little website called Spark People. There was many things I liked about it then and still liking it now...


All parts of the website are still free! That certainly makes it affordable for everyone. All you have to do is go to their website at and sign up for a free account to have full access to all their weight loss tools.


We aren't cookie cutter people in a cookie cutter world. Our lives can be hectic, our eating schedules sometimes random and not everyone's perfect food plan is carrot sticks and yogurt. Spark People offers flexibility so you can create your own customized meal plans to incorporate changes that are doable if you want to create a healthier lifestyle.


Not everyone wants to drop and do fifty pushups. Others, like myself, might be dealing with specific health issues that make exercising a special challenge. Spark People offers hundreds of different options to get moving...from ways to track your workouts to actual videos showing how to do the moves.


I imagine no matter what my question might be regarding starting a new, healthier lifestyle, I would be able to find an article at to help me stay on track. I'm not the first person to have lost my way to the food table and unfortunately I probably won't be the last. But at least for the brave ones who have decided to change their lives for the better, there is a huge treasure trove of information at their fingertips and again, it's all FREE!


Humans are not robots. We aren't wired to go through life alone and that includes fighting to create a healthier lifestyle for ourselves. Spark People has a wide range of community support groups you can join. Have special dietary needs? There's a group for that! Over 50 female? There's a group for that! Working the swing shift and trying not to eat all your meals on the go? There's probably even a group for that! 

A part of me is a deeply private spirit. But my extra weight I've gained over the years didn't happen while I sat on my tush on some deserted island somewhere. It happened in the middle of living my life among a sea of people. So why not reach out to some of those people who are struggling just like me and let's encourage each other to get over those hurdles together? That way, when we reach the finish line together, there will be someone to do the happy dance with...


Tuesday, February 3, 2015


You know...the one that just ran me over.  Then stopped. Turned around. And ran over me again.

Some people can go through life and deal with the little problems that come their way. No big deal and soon they are back on track.

Then there are some people who the gods manage to throw EVERYTHING they've got at them just to see how they are going to handle adversity. They just sit back in their golden recliners, pop open a beer and wait to see the fur fly.

I got caught up in one of those tornadoes of destruction yesterday. The kind where I wake up barely being able to catch my breath, only to find wave after wave of earth shattering news crashing all around me and threatening to drown me any second. The bad news started around 8 and it quickly developed into HORRIBLE news by noon.

The kind of news that feels surreal and leaves you reeling from the shock of it. I didn't know whether to cry, scream, run, or grab some chocolate. I decided to cry first and then ran to the store to buy chocolate.

I'm not proud of how I handled the ungodly amount of stress I felt yesterday. I was panicking and terrified and for about two hours not fully in control of my emotions. If there is any bright side to yesterday, it's the fact I could have done MUCH worse where food was concerned.

Today is another day. The scary-bad news is still hanging over my head like a cloud of doom but the initial shock is behind me. I find I can still breath, even though they are shaky breaths. I can also think clearly about what I put into my mouth today and I count THAT as a blessing.

I don't know what is going to happen in my world tomorrow but I do know one thing:

I'm stronger than I ever imagined I could be...

Thursday, January 29, 2015


Sometimes I think trying to make the right choices concerning my health is going to end up killing me. You would think trying to remove sugar from my diet would be an easy thing, but I'm finding it more challenging than I first thought.
Oh, I can take care of the obvious. I don't have candy or sugary drinks in the house. You won't find jams or jellies or powdered donuts in my pantry. Those are the easy things to turn my back on. I've always been more of a salty eater than a sweet one so removing them from my diet was easy peasy.

It's those hidden sugars I'm having trouble with. So I turned to the Internet for answers. And ended up more confused than ever.

I stumbled across an article talking about ten sugar myths. The more I read, the more I thought the article was full of baloney. Either I'm misunderstanding the entire angle Mr. Lyons is trying to convey in his rant about sugar not being all that bad for our health or he really is just writing hogwash in an attempt to gain a bit of publicity for himself. 

Either way, I've fed into it by even posting the link to his article here, but I'm really curious to see what people think about his thoughts on sugar and diet. You be the judge.

Am I wrong?? My search for answers continues...

Tuesday, January 27, 2015


Stepping off on a new adventure to a healthier me requires the world to not attempt to come crashing down around my ears. I've always been a multitasker and have no problem working on a number of different things at once. But add negative stress from someone I love becoming ill and my best laid plans will quickly go to hell in a hand basket.

This past weekend were two of the worst days I've had in a long time. That's my sweetie and my constant companion of fourteen years in the picture above. He has seen me at my best as well as my worst. He has been my guardian, my companion, and the gatekeeper of my greatest secrets for many years. But now I worry  for him.

About six months ago he developed a small cyst just behind his left ear. Over the months it continued to grow until I was really concerned. Sunday I was sitting in my chair when he came up to be petted. I reached down to pat his head and drew back a hand covered in blood. The cyst had burst and now my sweetie was drenched in blood.

I fought panic as I tried to clean him up. This is my baby. I raised him from a 5 month old kitten and I didn't know if he was going to be alright. After cleaning him up as best I could without trying to bathe him, I walked into my study to discover a large path of blood smeared across two walls and one rocking chair like someone had been bludgeoned to death in that room.

I felt sick to my stomach and spent the next two days wondering if my furry companion was going to leave me. I'm a stress eater so I also worried if I was going to allowed this type of worry affect what I put in my mouth.

Fortunately, things seem to have turned out okay with my companion. Every day he seems to return more and more to his former sassy self. And as he settles back into his normal routine, I can feel my own stress levels lowering to the point I too almost feel normal again.

I count myself lucky this time. I didn't turn to food when I worried the most. Maybe this new mindset will actually work. All I need to do is remember to take life one breath at a time...

Thursday, January 22, 2015


So, in my last post I said I think I might have a way to derail my sugar fix. I have other medical issues to consider and they all impact my eating habits. Remember those little steps I said I needed to take?

Little step number one:

Identify the problem. The problem is that I probably have consumed enough sugar over the years to sludge up my bloodstream to just short of concrete. THAT'S a terrifying thought. But I believe it's never too late to turn around and head in a healthier direction.

Little step number two:

Start searching for information that will help me reach that goal of breaking that sugar cycle. The first article I stumbled across is one from Dr. Mark Hyman's blog.

I started reading and thought to myself...this guy makes sense to me. He might just be talking smack, but it's smack I like. Here is a link to the article I read:

He also wrote a book called the 10 Day Detox Diet.

I can buy this book and fully commit to taking charge of my life. But I'm scared. When it comes to losing weight I've dealt with so many medical issues which complicate the weight loss that I'm also afraid to even hope this will help me.

Little step number three:

Decide on a course of action.

Oh, should I take this little step? Will it be what I'm looking for??

What would YOU do?

Tuesday, January 20, 2015


Did you know that sugar is FOUR TIMES more addictive to our brains than COCAINE?

I read that statistic in a doctor's report the other day and I think that's just insane!

When I was younger I never thought to myself, "When I grow up, I'm going to be a drug addict." But now I am an adult and I am pumping into my body a "drug" more dangerous for me than an illegal substance killing thousands of people every year. And I do it with a smile on my face.

Did you also know when the food companies try to reduce the fat content in their food to make it more appealing to the public perception, they will add SUGAR as their main substitute for fat? And that once the sugar enters your bloodstream it causes your whole system to become inflamed to a point that, over time, it will cause your body to destroy itself?

All from a little bit of sweetener added to my daily cup of tea.

I promised myself I would take baby steps this time. I promised myself I would be honest with myself and so I must look myself in the mirror and announce to the world what my heart knew all along...


There. I feel better now. Now I just need to figure out a way to break my habit and I think I might have found a way...

Thursday, January 15, 2015


Last night I hit my first hurdle on my road to a healthier me. I know my downfall is chocolate so when a friend of mine gave me two packets of snack size Hershey milk chocolate bars I should have politely declined. Of course I didn't. 

When I got them back to my house I should have maybe put them in the freezer to portion them out later or hidden them in the far corner of the pantry...the ol' out of sight, out of mind trick. But I didn't.

I waited until after I made myself a healthy stir-fry vegetable dinner and then had chocolate for dessert. Too much of it in fact. I realized after the third little snack bar that it was WAY TOO SOON to think I had any level of control over my sugar addiction yet so I did the only thing I COULD do. I threw the rest of them away.

I grew up with the knowledge of two things concerning, there was never enough of the tasty stuff around but plenty of "food" to eat I wouldn't have fed my dog, and two, my mother would have literally beat me with a belt if I didn't consume everything she put in front of me at mealtime. For me to throw away even harmful junk food was a herculean task and one I could be proud of.

I came across a wonderful website to help me with my challenge to become a healthier me and the best thing about it? It's FREE!! You can visit their website by going to It has a website, an iPhone app and even a YouTube tutorial. Check it out...

Tuesday, January 13, 2015


I found this flag somewhere on the internet. It actually belongs to the people of the Gambier Islands but I think I will borrow it for now. I know nothing about the Gambier people but if this island is like most places, there was struggle in the beginning to grow the culture which lives there now. Two steps forward, one step back sort of pace as the roots of one civilization dug in and began to grow.

I like the look of this flag...five little stars to represent the start of something bigger. Just like the first five pounds I've now lost since beginning this journey to a healthier me. No, it's not been easy. For me, food is tied to my emotions and it's been a roller coaster week where that is concerned. My boss came down with the flu and I ended up running the entire school by myself for the week. It's not that I thought myself incapable of handling it. I felt bad my best friend was so ill and I'm really happy now he's on the mend. It's just I am responsible for soooo many things in my life (even if it's of my own choosing) and being fully responsible for the school, even for only a week, put more emotional stress on me than I would have liked. 

The old ME would have come home every night and dove into chocolate...or maybe chips. I typically use food to put a damper on my stress induced emotions but, at least for this past week, I didn't. I had already cleaned out my cupboards so when I got home, the only indulgent food in the pantry was the peanut butter and sugar free strawberry jam I eat for breakfast. Not exactly the stuff of binging fantasies so I drank a mug of hot green tea with Splenda instead and watched some TV til the urge to eat ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING passed.

It's a baby step for me...this purging my system of the craving for sugar. I watched a documentary recently on sugar addition in America and it said our brains react in the same way to the "high" from sugar as it does from the "high" of cocaine or heroin. That's kinda scary when I KNOW those drugs will kill you so just what is SUGAR doing to me???

So wave on little five-star flag. Wave on for the first five pounds I've said goodbye to on the road to a healthier me and may many, many more stars be added to my little flag in the days to come!

Thursday, January 8, 2015


No, I don't mean this kind of hungry...where you grab a plate and see how much it can hold before spillover. For being overweight, I'm really not a person who spends every waking moment thinking about food. Just ask my sister...when we are running around on Saturday doing our errands, I can literally go all day long without even thinking about eating. So that's not my problem.

I have my list of favorites like anyone else. Here are the four "C" foods I will indulge in even if I'm not particularly hungry

1. Chicken
2. Chinese
3. Cheese
4. Chocolate


Chicken I eat every day...sometimes three times a day. It's surprising I haven't started clucking a long time ago. I use to also eat a lot of carrots (another "C" food) until my skin literally started to turn orange and my doctor told me to step away from the carrots!


Chinese is VERY tempting to me so for right now I have to just avoid it like the plague. Remember the whole control thing I talked about in my last post? Yeah, this is where I have none if you drop me down in the middle of a Chinese restaurant so I just don't go there right now...maybe I'll be back one day.


I like every type of cheese from fat free cream cheese to those little triangles of Laughing Cow spreadable cheese to Monterey Jack and Sharp Cheddar hard blocks of cheese. From grilled cheese sandwiches to shredded on my salad to pieces dunked into spinach dip, I love cheese!


Chocolate is dangerous for me. It's not like I'm allergic to it. My son was, however, until he was a teenager so guess who was left to eat the chocolate holiday candy that came his way? The reason why chocolate is bad for me is because it is my number one "go to" food when I'm upset or stressed. I'm an emotional eater and I allow myself to indulge in chocolate whenever I have challenges in my life that make me uncomfortable. My goal in 2015 is to slowly find other ways to replace the chocolate in my life...

One of the websites I've come across to help me claw my way back to a healthier me is Lisa Lillian's HUNGRY GIRL website. You can find it at This fabulous website has it all. You can sign up for a free daily email with healthy tips and tricks. There is a Facebook page, a Twitter page, a recipe archive, The Hungry Girl Diet book as well as other Hungry Girl books, a Pinterest account, and even the Hungry Girl TV show!

This is one of your one stop shop websites and if I can't find things to help me on my journey, I seriously need to consider getting my eyesight checked!

Maybe you're already a Hungry Girl or maybe you are still struggling like me to figure out how to regain control of your life. It's okay...we're in this together and 2015 is gonna be a great year for us Hungry Girls...;~)

Hopefully you'll be seeing a lot less of ME real soon!

Thanks for stopping by and come back any time!